The Ins and Outs of Porn: What You Need to Know
It’s natural to be curious about other people’s bodies and sex. Some people like to watch pornography to find out more and explore their sexual preferences, whilst others may have no interest or enjoyment in it. Whatever your take on porn, it’s worth knowing the facts, risks and benefits.
WARNING: Due to the nature of the subject, some of the content in this blog may not be suitable for some of our younger readers.
This blog is part of our No Shame No Secrets – Sexual Health and Wellbeing Campaign, where we look at many different elements of keeping yourself sexually healthy and safe. You’ll find links to all our campaign blogs here, and follow our social media channels (links at the bottom of the blog) to watch some fun videos.
What is porn?
Pornography, often referred to as porn, is explicit written text, pictures, audio files and videos that show sexual activity in a way that is designed to turn you on (get you sexually aroused). Porn has been around for a long, long time and, because of the internet and mobile phones, it’s never been more easily accessible.
Some pornography is created professionally. Some are created by the general public and shared online. If you’re curious or already watching it, understanding the law will help keep you out of trouble.
Can I get in trouble for watching porn?
In the UK, anyone can watch pornography, but you can only buy porn if you’re over 18. You can have pornographic content on your phone or printed as long as the content is legal.
Although it isn’t illegal for you to watch porn if you’re under 18, it isn’t created with young people in mind. It’s specifically designed for adults and can sometimes show things that could be harmful, upsetting, or scary.
You should be aware that some pornography is illegal (find out more in Childline’s ‘Fact About Porn’ section). It is also illegal to share or show porn to someone under 16. If you see anything that makes you feel uncomfortable or you think is wrong, tell a trusted adult, or take a look at the contacts in the ‘Further information and support’ section below.
There are lots of different types of porn
Sometimes you might stumble across porn even if you aren’t looking for it, like on social media or an advert on a website, or you might be deliberately searching for it.
Porn shows lots of different ways to have sex and ways of pleasuring yourself or someone else. Watching porn can be a healthy way to learn about sex (although it can become unhealthy – see below) and encourage you to explore what turns you on and your sexuality from the comfort of your own home, without the need for another person (although you can watch it with someone else if you wish).
If you watch porn, you may come across something that you find really arousing. If you continue to watch these types of videos and enjoy that theme, you may have a particular kink or fetish. It’s absolutely okay to have niche sexual interests, as long as you and anyone you’re exploring them with are safe, and the sexual activity you’re watching or doing is legal and consensual.
Whilst most categories on mainstream porn sites are legal to watch, there is a fine line between legal and illegal. A video with ‘teen’ in the title should not feature someone under 18. If the actor is over 18, this is legal, but, as somebody watching the video, there’s no way of knowing for sure. You have to be careful what you watch.
Talk to a trusted adult if you’ve seen porn that makes you feel upset, worried or scared. If you need to report porn because you think it is harmful or illegal, it’s important that you do this. You can Report Harmful Content online anonymously and confidentially.
Porn is not what real sex is like
A lot of porn doesn’t represent what real sex is like. It’s created for adult entertainment, so isn’t there to educate about contraception, STIs or getting consent.
Heteronormative sex tends to be more common in porn. This is penis-in-vagina sex with pleasure primarily for the person with the penis. In reality, there are many ways to have sex where everybody involved can feel good. It’s important to know that the way sex is shown in lots of porn is based on sexual desires and fantasies that make money. It may not be how you or others want to have sex.
Porn doesn’t usually show the realities of sex, like laughing during sex, needing a drink or stopping for a pee. Pornography actors tend to be limited to specific shapes and sizes, like tiny waists, big breasts, muscles, huge penises and hairless bodies. Some porn actors have surgery to look a certain way or take pills to perform better or keep an erection longer. In real life, most of us don’t have these types of bodies, which can make you feel ashamed or nervous about having sex.
Deepfakes
Some porn is created by using AI (artificial intelligence). These could be putting celebrity faces on other people’s bodies, making it look like they are in porn videos when they aren’t. This type of video, called deepfakes, can make it difficult to spot what’s real and what’s not. This type of porn can be worrying as it can be created using any photographs found on the internet.
The Future of Revenge Porn – This BBC Sounds audio is intended for over 16’s.
Contains some strong language and explicit sexual scenes and scenes some listeners may find upsetting.
The dangers of watching too much porn
Watching too much porn could start affecting how you think and feel, harming your physical and mental health. Let’s take a look at a few dangers of watching too much porn:
Views on body image
Watching porn can impact how you feel about your own body, making you think you have to look a certain way. You might compare yourself to the people you’ve seen in videos and start feeling unhappy with your appearance. This could lead to you trying to change your appearance by over-exercising, not eating, or removing pubic hair to look like the actors you see in porn. You may start to feel self-conscious about the way your genitals look and feel ashamed to show your body.
It could also affect how you see others and make you feel differently about what attracts you. You might start judging people for not looking the way that people in porn videos do. This is because you’re comparing the porn actors to the people around you.But, this isn’t what most people look like.
Addiction
Some people can get addicted to porn and want to watch it all the time. It becomes all they can think about, distracting them and affecting their work and relationships.
If you have to watch more and more pornography to get turned on and struggle to focus, it could point towards a porn addiction.
Unrealistic expectations
Seeing the way people behave or are treated in pornography videos could lead to you expecting your sexual partner to act in the same way. It gives unrealistic expectations of sex and could lead to you feeling unsatisfied and make your partner feel pressured, embarrassed, or that they’re not enough. People rarely act like they do in porn videos.
Sexting, sending nudes and revenge porn
You don’t have to watch lots of porn to be caught up in the dangers of the online world. Certain things may count as pornographic content without you realising it.
Sexting is when you share sexual content such as texts, audio notes, photographs and videos with someone, whether you know them or not. Sexual content includes fully naked images, partially naked images, and talking or acting out sexual acts. Check out our blog Digital Intimacy: Keeping Yourself Safe When Sexting to understand the law if someone is under 18 or if you don’t have consent.
Young people aged under 18 who are worried a sexual image or video of them may have been shared online can use the Report Remove tool to get it taken down.
If you’re a victim of revenge porn and you’re over 18, then contact the Revenge Porn Helpline. This includes Deepfakes.
Further information and support
- No Shame No Secrets – Meic’s sexual health campaign
- Report Remove – a tool to help young people under 18 to report sexual images and videos of themselves and get them removed from the internet
- ThinkUKnow – information from CEOP about protecting yourself online and offline. This includes Relationships, Socialising Online, Online Safety, Nudes, Sex and Sexual Content Online, and Sexual Abuse
- Revenge Porn Helpline – supporting victims of revenge porn over 18
- Brook – a charity offering support for sexual health and wellbeing
- What are deepfakes and how do they work? – BBC Bitesize
- Report Harmful Content – helps you to report harmful content you’ve seen online, including sexual communications or pornographic content.
Talk to Meic
If you feel like pornography affects your mental and physical health, seek support from an adult you trust. Meic is the information, advice and advocacy helpline for children and young people across Wales. Contact Meic if you need to talk to someone about anything that’s worrying or upsetting you. It’s free, confidential and anonymous. The service is open from 8am-midnight every day, and you can contact them by phone, text, or online chat.
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