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Grab the Meic: Nudes Nightmare

What should you do if someone asks you to send them nude photos? This is the question asked us in this Grab the Meic. We discuss consequences, the law and why you shouldn’t feel pressured to do something that doesn’t feel right.

Grab the Meic is your opportunity to ask us about anything that’s worrying you. We’re here to listen and give advice. If you want to #grabthemeic then check out this page, but remember this advice is not instant. If you need advice quickly then please contact the helpline.

 I ddarllen y cynnwys yma yn Gymraeg clicia yma

Hi Meic,

There’s a girl I really like in the year above me, and we’re both on Snapchat a lot and she’s really funny. The other day she started messaging me for “different” snaps of me like nudes and that but I’m not sure I want to. I know my mates have done it, but I don’t want it to seem like I haven’t got the guts so I can’t really talk to them. What happens if I do it?

Meic’s Advice

Hi there!

Thanks for getting in touch with us here at Meic.

I can tell that this is something that is worrying you and it’s great that you’ve come through to us to talk about this. It’s a tricky dilemma, but one that faces lots of young people as technology is a big part of our everyday lives.

The law

Snapchat is a really great way to stay connected with your friends and share pictures of what you have been doing with your time, however if used in the wrong way sharing images can get you and the other person into trouble and could also place you at risk.

What your friend has asked you to do is something that is known as “sexting”, sending naked pictures of yourself via social communication. It’s okay that you feel confused about this and there could actually be serious consequences if you do this when you are under 18 as you’re classed as a child in the eyes of the law.

The law says that it is illegal to possess or share “indecent images” of anyone under the age of 18, even selfies.

If you, or your friend, were to be found in possession of naked image of yourselves or each other you could both face criminal charges. To help you understand this, Childline has some information about Sexting that you could read through.

Maybe you could share this with your friend to help her understand why you don’t want to send her these pictures?

Losing control

Another thing to consider about sexting is that even on apps like Snapchat, although the image may seem to have disappeared this does not mean that it is gone and it is easy for the recipient to take a screenshot of this with their phone. If you do not fully trust the person who has received the photo, there is then the chance that this photo could be shared with others without your consent, which for an intimate or nude image could be both hurtful and upsetting. Even if you trust that person now, what happens if you argue or split up?

Brook has lots of advice about sexting, including what to do if you’ve already shared a nude, coping with pressure to send one, and asking someone for one.

Peer pressure

You mention feeling worried about your other friends finding out that you don’t want to do this. You’re worried about them thinking you don’t have the guts. If they are good friends they will support you whatever your decision and if you’re not ready to take this step with your friend then that’s okay. If she, or your other friends, put you under pressure to send these texts, this is called sexual pressuring and you don’t have to give in to this if you’re not ready.

It sounds like your friend is looking for the relationship to become intimate, it might be worth discussing this with her to find out where you both stand and if that’s what you both really want.

Childline have some tips about talking about sex, knowing when you’re ready and consent.

I hope the information has been helpful, and thanks for coming through to us. If you still feel unsure about what to do and want to discuss this a bit more please feel free to contact us on the phone, text or online chat, every day between 8am and midnight.

Take care

The Meic team

Related article:

Sexting And Sexual Exploitation